Losing Touch

It's appalling to realise that week passes by after week swiftly. This phenomenon is especially so after I joined OCBC. It will soon be 2 years for me in the bank next month!

Have you ever really pondered and envisaged what you've been doing during the course of your lifespan until now? Honestly, I find it hard to even comprehend. It's distressing because I find that I'm losing my own meaning of life. I'm not being suicidal here alright. Haha. Simply because I'm going through the conventional way of lifestyle everyone is leading here. Does that mean that I don't belong here, this our homeland? It's all committments' faults. Loads of it. And I think we can't live without it cuz afterall, committments motivate us to pursue our goals, aren't they supposed to?

Yes, I'm losing touch with myself gradually. I miss myself more 5 years back. The one that I was in awe and envy of. The one who was filled with much more zest and reasons to live and love. I've lost touch with myself. Sigh. So much for the melancholy, I tried to console myself that there is impermanence in every single stage of my life and therefore, I need to be adaptive and receptive to ever-changing situations/people. Maybe I should thank God that my life is sort of mellow and tranquil now. I have a healthy family, a job that pays me reasonably well, great pals and a boyfriend who adores me much. Well, I do not possess the above 5 years back. Life is fair they say. :)

Thank God It's Friday tomorrow! I can't wait for weekend immunity to hit me...